A Good Night - Really!

I'm dancing in my living room/kitchen. Really, the kitchen is so small I must dance in the living room or risk serious injury.

"Now if she does it like this, will you do it like that
Now if she touches like this, will you touch her right back
Now if she moves like this, will you move it like that (come on)
Shake shake, shake shake uh shake it!"

Life is good. I'm not sure why precisely, though I have some ideas, and overall I have a very strong feeling that things are going to start going our way. Maybe a job in San Francisco for me? Signs are promising, as long as I keep my crap together, beginning with getting my head around managing stuff. I need to act like a 35-year-old. I think can manage that. The gf is quitting her crappy job, so she'll be happier, which will in turn make me happier. This is one of the main components of a relationship, I've learned: commiseration. That's what makes a friend more than a friend. If your pain affects the other person, or your joy, and vice versa, then it's something more.

I'm also getting into better shape, losing a little weight, cooking more, feeling more confident in the kitchen, and experimenting with some stuff. I just made whipped cream in anticipation of a cheesecake at the end of the week for a potluck to which we were invited. Ok, whipped cream is not a big deal. But a cheesecake? A pumpkin cheesecake nonetheless, like the one my sister made for Thanksgiving.

Cheesecake for Thanksgiving, you ask? Yes, my family does this thing where since I'm the only one that likes pure pumpkin pie, we do a variation of pumpkin pie each year to try to get others to enjoy it (is it obvious that I am the most tolerant and open-minded person in the family?). Thus, I haven't had real pumpkin pie on Thanksgiving with my family in probably about 5 years. I respect the attempts to popularize what, in America, is already a pretty popular dish, but sometimes, I just want creamy, filling, orange squash pie. In any case, this cheesecake blew me out of the house. It was absolutely amazing, so I will attempt it myself tomorrow night. Wish me luck!

Another thing that is making me happy is a bit of a crush. I have absolutely no right to have a crush on this woman, but she's cute and funny, so that makes me excited and flirty. Flirting is fun, people - and I highly recommend it.

I also want to confess a dream I've had for some time now - I really, really, really want to do karaoke at work. Mostly because I think I'm amazing at karaoke, as anyone from college can confirm - not that I'm good, I mean, but that I think I'm good. Modesty has never been a strong point of mine, particularly when it comes to music/singing. And I want to impress my co-workers, admittedly some more than others, with my incredible singing and dancing. Ha.

Speaking of music, if and when I move to San Francisco in the coming weeks/months, I will attempt to join the Bay Area Rainbow Symphony. It's a symphony made up primarily of gay men, an amateur one, and a friend of mine from back in the day - dirty Jersey (eww I can't believe I just said that) - is in it. He's convinced me that I should do it, not like I needed much prodding. I miss orchestra playing, and I'd be psyched to get into a chamber group from that group as well. The possibilities are endless!

Finally, I've decided I'm going to try to write a novel. That's going to be my ticket to fame and fortune - or at least a feeling of satisfaction that I might be able to ride until it runs out of batteries - or skate on until I lose momentum (just practicing my metaphors). Maybe I've been listening too much to This American Life, but some days, I pull into my little parking spot and think, "What happened to me would make a great story. I should write it down." And then I promptly forget it. So I've decided that each day, I'm going to come home and write for 30 minutes about my day. We'll see how that goes. I think it's called a journal - remember those? Before blogs, Facebook status updates, and Twitter, people used to come home and write in real books, on paper, with pens. I used to have a journal in college. It fell by the wayside when I got happier with my life. I think I need to pick it up again - it was a valuable hobby for me. It helped my memory, I think... though I can't really remember.

Alright, I've exhausted my topics for tonight. Perhaps I'll write again tomorrow, if I'm done with my cake around the time that the Internet is working again. To quote a great email newsletter, "Be well, do good work, and keep in touch."

PS - Write Christmas cards!

Paul Krugman Rocks My World

He rocks. I heard him last night at the Flint Center in beautiful Cupertino, CA on the campus of De Anza College. He was witty, funny, and elucidating - or as much as one can be when discussing the economic nuclear holocaust in which we are currently engulfed. It wasn't happy news, people - optimist, perhaps, he is not. Realist, though, he most certainly is- tempered by a heavy dose of intelligent liberalism. And he saw this one coming - read his book.

His talk in a nutshell: we will be out of this recession in 15 years according to the only statistic that truly matters to the general public: unemployment at the same rate before it began in 2007. For us to get from the current 10.2% to the before-the-recession rate of 5%, it will take about 15 years at the current rate of economic growth. Asked whether or not this downturn/depression will contribute in the long-term to economic inequality, he answered that in the short-term, no. But in the long-term, it remains to be seen. I'm guessing yes.

In between those dire predictions, he talked about the bank bailout, which is separate from the stimulus package, executive pay, and other pertinent topics. He mentioned that executive bonuses are detrimental in that they are actually so large that they take away from the capital that these banks so desperately needed, but they wouldn't otherwise be super offensive. From a public relations perspective, though, they are a disaster.

The final conclusion of the night: we need more stimulus, even though it is a political fantasy not grounded in possibility, much less probability. We needed about $1.4 trillion back in January, not the measley $700 billion we got, and so things are more sluggish than they could be. He also recommended some kind of huge job stimulus like the Works Progress Administration or the Civilian Conservation Corps of the 1930s (to which, by the way, we owe our National Parks). Can't say that it would be a bad idea, though that kind of "socialist takeover of our economy" would never happen with this Congress.

Anyway, he rocks. Check out one of his recent columns from the New York Times. Also, kudos to the host of the night, Dick Henning, and founder of the Celebrity Forum Speaker Series, who was hilarious. My favorite joke of the night: "Winston Churchill and Mrs. Nancy Astor used to have frequent heated discussions at the bar. On one occasion, Mr. Churchill said to Mrs. Astor, "Madam you are ugly." To which she responded, "Mr. Churchill, you are drunk." Mr. Churchill retorted: "Yes, but tomorrow, I'll be sober!" It's a good one. That Winston Churchill...

Toodles, my wonderful followers and infrequent readers! Hope you enjoyed your time spent here- I know I did.

Crissy Field Adventure

View Crissy Field w/ Erin and Terrel in a larger map

I Want to Be Important

I'm not very important. I don't really do anything very important, no one reads what I write, even at work, and everyone else has important meetings for the sake of meeting other important people. I'm never invited because, well, I'm insufficiently important.

Boo. Being young sucks sometimes.

A Short B***h Session

I just felt like coming here and expressing some frustration. Things I don't like:

1. Friends who don't get back to me.
2. Coming to grips with the fact that those people are no longer my friends.
3. Dealing with other people's ineptitude.
4. Being hormonal.
5. Feeling emo with no real outlet.
6. Documentaries that use the same phrase over, and over, and over again, e.g. "But this was not enough to protect it. (Insert activist name here) knew that to save the land, it needed to be a National Park." Sorry, Ken Burns- I was not that impressed in retrospect. Still, I will visit the national parks.
7. Republicans whose only policy initiative is to make the Democrats lose. We don't need you to do that- we can do that very well ourselves, thanks.
8. Automatic responses from "Senators" that make it obvious they did not read your email. At least pretend in a more compelling way.
9. People who create separate non-profit organizations instead of combining resources with other existing institutions who could do the job better. Because we really need more NGOs to which I feel compelled to give money.
10. Duplicating work.

I think I will leave it at that. Feel free to back me up on any of these things, reader/s.

I Had a Point to Make Earlier

I have since forgotten it. So let's move on.

I ordered cable television today. Some months back, the gf and I bought a digital antenna to see if we could get free digital television. Really, I just wanted to get KQED and KTEH so that I could speak intelligently about what was on the stations for which I work. Needless to say, it was a miserable failure. We mounted the Batman-symbol-esque antenna onto every wall in the house, even contemplated suspending it from the ceiling, but ultimately decided it was not worth it. If I wanted television, I was going to have to buy into the monopoly of Comcast. But Danielle, isn't DirecTV cheaper in some areas? Yes. But sadly, we can't mount anything outside of the apartment. Not out the window. Not on the public balcony. Nowhere. So we are codemned to cable. I wouldn't mind if it were the better out of many options, but it seems unfair. But it doesn't bother me enough to not get it, apparently. Anyway it's only $15 a month.

Today is Sunday. In fact, the last Sunday before the NFL season starts. Every Sunday from now on for the next 4 months will involve sport watching. I look forward to it, but I must remind myself to leave the apartment for my indoor soccer games. I don't want to be that girl with the unsightly beer gut. I don't think it would ever get to that point, but one can never be too careful.

Tomorrow, I will be going to the library to write a long email to a friend I have not written to in some time. I told him that I would write him an email before I could resume writing letters as we had previously done because I had things to say that couldn't possibly wait an extra three weeks. Now that it's only a week before the cast comes off, however, I wonder if that is truly the case. Is my life so important as to warrant a long email tomorrow? Unlikely, but I will do it anyway because I'd like to think of myself as a woman of her word.

Ok, I don't think I have anything more to add. Already listened to my favorite podcasts- This American Life, Wait Wait Don't Tell Me, and The Moth. I think that constitutes a day. It's time to go for a run. Cheers!

A Country's Emotions

This week, I attended a Town Hall Meeting with the lovely Congresswoman Anna Eshoo from California's 14th (CA-14 for those of you following along at home includes Menlo Park, Palo Alto, Mountain View, Sunnyvale, and hugs the coast all the way down to Santa Cruz). For a better map than my description, visit her homepage. I wanted to go and be a part of it all and see what all the media outlets were talking about. Well, sorry to disappoint, but no one brought a gun, there were no fights, and the protesters were sedate. They stood there respectfully, the single-payer 'Raging Grannies' sang a song, the real nut jobs passed out silly flyers, there was a guy who tried to tell me to think like him in order to think for myself, Oraganizing for America people were there trying to get me to volunteer, and there were police maintaining the fire code. I was laughing all the way into the crowded auditorium. People are nuts. Had it been for an issue like school vouchers, no one would have showed up. Two years ago, if we had started having town hall meetings, I would have guessed that no one would have come for a healthcare discussion either. Maybe they wouldn't have. In any case, they are coming out now.

The hall was packed. The auditorium held about 900 people, and there were very few open seats by the time I arrived a few minutes late. Local television crews were inside I later discovered, because apparently it was on the news that night or the next day. The San Jose Mercury News covered it if you would like to read a little more. Originally I had intended to meet up with Planned Parenthood to make our voices heard about the necessity of including women's health options in the public plan, but I did not get a chance to meet with the group. I asked a question, however, and though it didn't make it to her at the meeting, I hope someone will read it and get my point. No surprise, it was about abortion and contraceptive coverage. One of PP's questions made it to her and she answered it, focusing not on contraception or abortion but mammograms and maternity leave. No one gets upset about that.

I sat in the progressive peanut gallery, next to a doctor, a couple who lamented the loss of the single-payer idea, and an aged hippie to my right who took the time to clap and scream at the crazy conservatives at the opposite end of the hall. My mom asked me if most people there were for or against the public option. I am unsure, but my guess was that most were for it, though those against were indeed very loud.

Rep. Eshoo scored a lot of points for her liberal base, talking about how she had voted against the Iraq War, the costs of which dwarf what we will spend yearly on healthcare reform, speaking kindly about Medicare as a public healthcare option (that most in the audience already had), and generally towing the party line while probably not convincing anyone who came in there disagreeing with her already.

Overall, my conclusion is that minds are not changing. Either public healthcare is a socialist takeover or a long-awaited human right, with most people falling somewhere inbetween. My other thought is that people are afraid of the unknown, which includes both a new government program and a black president. Much of this has to do with race anc ethnicity. The other part has to do with class.

The vehemence with which people are holding onto their deepest fears and prejudices is alarming to me. This country seems to be getting way out of control. I think the healthcare debate is at a boiling point and has been for a month or so, but other things are happening around the country too. People are angry, scared, and stressed.

A few coworkers recently expressed to me their displeasure with management, convinced that no one cared about them and their bosses were only out for themselves. Voices were raised. Unions were discussed. At a recent live television event KTEH had called "Facing the Mortgage Crisis," I received emails from people watching at home who were upset and angry about the economy and were desperate for help. I recently saw a clip of the football player from Oregon punch that kid from Boise State and then erupt to the point at which the police had to escort him off the field.



He's been suspended for the entire year, by the way.

I've noticed that I've been angrier lately, too, and more likely to fly off the handle. Breaking my hand was a consequence of that. I'm scared of the future, of my gf not being able to find a job, of not being able to afford a house, of going into debt, and I feel a stronger sense of personal insult. I have been feeling more stress, and I'm getting a little worried.

My concerns are minor compared to what most people in America are feeling, and people are scared and angry, not knowing to whom they should direct their anger and frustration. For one thing, we no longer live in an accountable society. Maybe we never did. But now, we spend our time obfuscating the guilty culprits, generalizing about Wall Street instead of individuals, so that everything seems systemic and therefore unable to fix or blame. Is this really the case, or are there some individuals whom we can hold accountable?

But maybe now is not the time for that. With the national temperature as high as it is, it may not be a good idea to point fingers. Perhaps what we really need is healing. I guess that's where healthcare comes in.

Wow- Thank Goodness for the Internet

That and children's television. I hope KTEH picks this up for their daily lineup.

More Sexism

I've already listened too much to these Senate confirmation hearings for Judge Sonia Sotomayor. I'm super annoyed at the sexism in these hearings. No man would ever be accused of having a temperament problem. Where do these guys get off? He's badgering and condescending- does he think it's southern charm?

From the New York Times: “Do you have a temperament problem?” he asked. No, she replied. But he pressed on, saying the comments about her were “tough stuff” and having been raised at this hearing, should offer her an opportunity for “self-reflection.”

What a jerk.

Carole Joffe: The Legacy of George Tiller

Carole Joffe: The Legacy of George Tiller

Shared via AddThis

Outrage and Sadness

I am very upset and angry about abortion provider Dr. George Tiller's assassination. He was a hero for women's reproductive rights and health, a hero to abortion providers across the country, and a warm and caring soul. The hypocrisy of his being gunned down by an anti-choice nut job is just overwhelming. I don't even know what to say beyond that other than I have the utmost respect and gratitude for doctors who provide this vital service to women across the country and the world. There are fewer and fewer of them, and their targeting is abominable.

I hope to attend vigils in the Bay area should they materialize. If you want to send a note to his family expressing your support and condolences, visit the Feminist Majority Foundation action alert page.

Work... Life?

When I was about to graduate high school, I had this depressing epiphany. Everything I do in high school, I realized, was done in pursuit of a great college experience at a great college. Then, I concluded, everything one does in college (at least academically) is in pursuit of a great job or great graduate school. But that's when it ended, right? Wrong.

I've entered the working world, the professional world, full speed ahead. My boss encouraged me to join the professional organization of fundraisers called AFP (the Association of Fundraising Profesionals). Not only have I joined, but I have joined a committee (the collegiate chapter - sounded like a good idea because I am so recently collegiate, and it feels more like a college club than it has any right to be) AND joined the mentorship program. I'm a little overwhelmed. Mostly because since I joined AFP, work has been insane. But the larger problem than stress is this: all of the professional advancement I am undergoing is causing me to think about it ALL THE TIME. As an example, while running today (yes, sometimes I exercise), I ran by a garage sale - and thought to myself, "I wonder what they do, I should go and take some business cards." Truly desperate, I am not. Truly INSANE, I am.

So I have decided to begin a new full-time career on the weekends of chilling out. Also, no more AFP extracurriculars for awhile. We all have our limits. This is my new one. And I will begin being more lazy right after sending an email to the guy at the Dartmouth alumni mixer I attended on Thursday... AHHHHH!!!

My brother would be so proud. That alone is enough to make me question my actions.

...And I'm Back!

There's internet working, so I figured I'd take advantage and update the blog during non-working hours.

I will admit it - I have a crush on Obama. He is getting more and more liberal, at least in my head - and his ideas outlined in his budget are top rate from that perspective. He's taking on healthcare reform, education reform, and ending our dependence on foreign sources of energy. He is the best. But here is why I think so - I had an epiphany today.

It's contrast. For eight years, we had Bush. We had defense spending, largely in the form of an unjust war, a widening of the gap between rich and poor via tax cuts that put nothing in the pockets of most, lots in the pockets of the few and the wealthy, and no progress on anything. We saw our rights disappearing before our very eyes. We had an increase of security at the airports. I saw guns - and not just any guns, machine guns- at JFK Airport. We had fear. Now, we have something different.

People are excited. Maybe it's too much excitement and some time in the near future we'll go back to ignoring the politics as it turns usual, but it feels like someone's turning the page and putting that chapter behind us. Appropriately enough, the person who is doing that is a reader - Barack Obama. He's so different. He's more pragmatic than I think I'll end up liking, but so far, his priorities are in line, and I LOVE the way he speaks. He is awesome- and he is oh so much better than what we are used to hearing.

Fareed Zakaria: "In Washington, when you want to increase government spending, it is called "investment," not "expenditure." Wasteful spending is spending - good spending is investment in the future." Touche.

One other thing on my mind is this: this lawsuit against the creator of the Obama "Hope" poster. He changed it into art instead of an AP photograph - so it's his now. I don't get how that couldn't possibly fall under fair use. He changed the colors, even changed the angle of the head - and transformed its purpose. If every street artist has to pay $5,000 to use that photograph (and believe me, I'm sure that is what it would be worth just to purchase the original copyright- because I know how much it costs to use the NY Times logo), that would put the kibosh on street art. We can't afford that. I'm worried the Supreme Court isn't on our side, the side of poor but creative. We'll see.

Alright, I'm done for tonight. Peace out.

Working Already? And DOING GOOD??

This guy rocks. He's been in office for three days, and already, he's signed an order to close Guantanamo, cleaned up ethics, and the best one right now, REPEALING THE GLOBAL GAG RULE!! How awesome is that?

He's making good decisions so far and moving quickly to do stuff - I'm impressed almost as much as I was emotional when he was inaugurated. Seriously, so proud, so happy, so... hopeful.

A New Year, A New Post

Well, I have been more than derelict in my blogging lately. We have this problem in our apartment... the internet cannot find us there. It is very sad indeed. Thus, here I am, sitting at work after hours and writing a blog post.

Anyway, Happy New Year to the reader - I'm channeling Car Talk's hosts, Click and Clack because I noticed I only have one follower of my blog. California January weather officially wins. I haven't put on more than a sweatshirt so far this winter, and it's only going to get warmer. Even while we were running to catch the fireworks at midnight on the Embarcadero in San Francisco it was warm! Perhaps it was just me running that made it warm, but it couldn't have been very chilly if I had to peel my clothing off upon the return to my friend's place to sleep that night. This was the best New Year's celebration I had ever had. Yes, there was drinking, but there was also stimulating conversation and discussion. It was not all revelry, but it was fun.

Still searching for a full-time job for the "missus," but all in all, we are happy. My parents are coming to visit the Bay Area for the first time (ever for my mom, in 40-odd years for my dad), so I am trying to come up with interesting travel plans to keep them busy and happy. It won't be too hard because I live in one of the most beautiful places in the country.

Work is good. As can be expected in a workplace full of women, there is never a dull moment, and rarely a moment goes by without some degree of drama. Today was almost entirely drama-free, however, so hooray for small miracles. I sat upstairs, all by my lonesome, while employees with whom I have little contact scurried around the building unseen and largely unheard, and I worked my bum off. Now I am satisfied, no longer stressed, and barely ahead of the curve. Every day is a struggle for me to take things slower and do them better, but this is my cross to bear and I am glad to be employed.

What else can I say? Saw The Last King of Scotland on Tuesday and had nightmares about it. Yesterday, I watched the gf cry during Charlie Wilson's War. We had both had wine and were upset about the state of the world and the universality of hate. Why, truly, can we not all get along? Tomorrow, The Savages arrives, and I will have to watch that by myself, for the gf is not yet at the point where she can be at peace with a movie about nursing homes. This past weekend, we received Don't Mess with the Zohan, which I encourage you all to see. It is an entertaining, if not somewhat crude, take on the Israeli-Palestinian conflict. And it's very funny. Perhaps now is not the best time to watch it - or maybe it's just the right time, I'm not sure. I'll let you be the judge. All in all, to sum up: Netflix is awesome.

Finally, here is a photo (from the NY Times) for your thoughts. Think - I dare you.